The Egg

Light and Sound Therapy

Today I went to Chakra Sound Gardens in Sartell MN. I got to experience ‘the egg’ which is a light and sound therapy. I sat in there for forty minutes, listening to the soft music with the soft glow of purple and green lights.

At the end of forty minutes, there was ten minutes of silence. I just sat there and—supposedly—allowed the benefits to absorb.

The device was like a space ship, or like you were entering a virtual reality ride. It was quite the experience. Not super tiny but not overly spacious either.

The experience was very calming, very relaxing. I felt mellowed and if I hadn’t gotten such a good night’s sleep last night, I am quite confident that I would have fallen asleep.

I am supposed to stay well hydrated for the next few days and also to avoid alcohol and caffeine.

It was a calming experience and I am hoping that it—along with the craniosacral therapy—will help me with some resets.

It is true that I am always trying new things to help improve my quality of life and mental state, to heal my trauma.

I credit this to my mother. I learned from the example of what she didn’t do or couldn’t do for herself.

She would tell me that there was no use of suffering if there was help available.

But she did not get the help for herself. I saw her, miserable and sleep-deprived and unwell, with intense tummy issues and breathing troubles, at the end of her life.

I decided that though we carry the same genes, have similar examples of trauma, tendencies toward depression and anxiety and insomnia, that this would not be my story.

Last week I experienced a cortisol spike. I can feel when this happens—it’s like adrenaline coursing through my veins, or some stimulant like a quadruple shot of espresso is running through my system.

When this happens, I can’t calm my mind and body to sleep. I know from previous experience that when this starts to happen that I need to get some help.

I took on a new anti-depressant, started drinking mushroom coffee, and got magnesium and cortisol control supplements and a complex Vitamin B pill. I don’t know which of them is the one to thank—or perhaps it is the craniosacral therapy—but I am relieved to be sleeping better than I did for a few days last week.

Serious insomnia in laying awake all night is not fun. My mother and best friend did it for years and though some people live like that, I will do everything in my power not to. Not having sleep makes it very difficult to function, to think, process, to be pleasant, to enjoy life.

I feel calmer, steadier. My hands feel colder and though I feel more groggy when I wake up, a bit spacier and more sleepy, I’ll take it over the fatigue that is exhaustion from sleep deprivation and cortisol spikes when my body is in flight/fight mode.

Calming the central nervous system is important and lowering the cortisol levels in ways that we can control is helpful.

(Though I must admit that, after reading about how to lower your cortisol levels, that I read—get enough sleep. I thought — oh come the f - - k on! Really? What a mind f - - k that is!)

I do what I can. And I am thankful to live in an era where there is such a wealth of information available at our fingertips, that we can try alternative methods of healing, involving light and sound and energy.

I am on a path, no, a quest of healing.

As I journey forward, I am oh so thankful to have the resources, the ability to find them, to try them in my candid efforts to heal from all this intergenerational and personal trauma.