The Elusiveness of Sleep

for the Mentally Ill

I have never been a good sleeper. Ever since I was little.

Some of it could be blamed on a tiny bladder, frequent urinary tract infections and hypoglycemia (that woke me up at night and drove me to the kitchen where my mom found me raiding the fridge for pepperoni and cheese).

But I wake up a lot. And I wake up very easily.

Even when I went through horrible bouts of insomnia, many of the sleep aids didn’t knock me out as they promised to do, and how they worked for others.

I both envy and am amazed by people who sleep for 8+ hours straight, who could sleep through the loudest noises, and could fall sleep anywhere—sitting upright, any strange bed, in a plane, etc.

Anti-depressants have helped my sleep at various points in my life, but not always.

Supplements and herbs like Valerian Root, L-Theanine, and Ashwanga root have helped some, but not as miracle drugs. CBD oil can and sometimes does, but not always.

The one thing that has made a tremendous difference in my sleep has been probiotics and bio cleanse, gut health supplements.

I was reminded recently of how much they help when I had to go off them. I had a sinus infection and was proscribed an antibiotic. (Pointless to take pills for “good bacteria” if you’re going to take medicine to kill all bacteria in your system.)

I had some differences in regularity and digestion, but that could have been from the antibiotics.

But the biggest difference I noticed was how my sleep was negatively affected.

Since finishing the antibiotic, and going back on my supplements, I am sleeping so much better.

I mean—I get sleepy, I am able to fall asleep, to calm my mind. I stay asleep longer and don’t wake up randomly for no reason. And when I sleep, I sleep heavier. I dream. I wake up feeling more refreshed and well rested.

Those are gifts for many people with anxiety and depression and PTSD. Sleep is often elusive for some of us with mental illness. And it seems to be that you either lack it and sleep not enough or at all, or go to the other extreme and sleep too much.

Because as my mother and best friend have said to me (and both have had much, much worse insomnia than I ever had)

“Not sleeping is hell.”

“Insomnia ruins lives.”

Another friend said— “Exhaustion is hell.”

Let us do whatever we can and share ideas for sleep help.